i remember the whole reason i decided to take on this nannying job. i remember why i decided leaving the state for a few months was a good idea. i felt stuck in a rut at home, like i was missing the piece to nudge me out. i thought that by going 2000 miles away for two months would be enough of a change to clear my head. boy was i wrong. everything i thought i was missing was right under my nose. everything that could get me out of my rut was taken for granted. i refused to budge, so i thought leaving it would fix it. i truely hate it here. i'm bored, and lonely. i miss my friends, my family, my job, and my boyfriend. i have yet to speak with my aunt on this matter, but am doing so tonight. i WILL be coming home on the 18th. i will walk to the airport if i have to. my uncle lost his job and i am no longer needed here until september. my mom needs my help back home. i need to go home for my own personal sake. i am becoming severely depressed and can't sleep at night. what i thought would help me seems to be hurting me now.
this morning i was making breakfast for the kids, and my uncle walks in. he asked me how i slept last night and i told him i had a hard time falling asleep. he procedes to act concerned and asks me why. i told him i'm really homesick. about an hour or so later he stops by my door and says, "i'm sorry your so homesick, but you just need to work through it." bull shit. little does he know i'm leaving in about 10 days. there is no working through being so homesick i'm depressed.
bottom line. i'm going home on the 18th.
see you all in 10 days!!!!!!!!!
